The storage situation on the Wii is sorta abysmal, especially if you’re an avid Virtual Console or WiiWare fan and have lots of games. Don’t worry, Nintendo knows it. According to a translated interview with Latin American pub Club Nintendo, Reggie and Miyamoto say that you can expect an announcement about storage goodness in the future, since they’re working on a number of technologies, but it won’t be a hard drive.

Nope, Reggie says it’s even better than a hard drive. Could it be online storage? (That’s the only thing we can think of besides a hard drive, since online storage is actually super cheap nowadays.) Whatever it is, if it involves hardware, expect it to be one of the few Wii peripherals Nintendo makes, since Miyamoto says they have enough already. Amen to that. [Go Nintendo via CVG via Kotaku]

While Nintendo may have invented one of the most graceful products of the modern era in the Wiimote, such only makes it all the more tempting for third party manufacturers (as well as Nintendo its freaking self) to spoil the fun with extrapolation. Take the Wiimax, it turns your Wiimote into a coveted plastic machine gun or rifle—but it doesn’t stop there, my friends.

WiiMax takes superfluousness of design one step further, adding a laser sight. While some may believe the laser is for aiming, the wiser among us realize that the Wiimax’s designer, forced to take such a lousy position, added the laser in hopes that a mirror would one day refract the beam into a user’s eyes, burning the retina like a sizzling egg and preventing any more enjoyment/bastardization of the Wiimote.

Seriously, these peripherals are the equivalent to putting a sweater on a cat. The cat may look stupid, but you’re the one who looks like a douchebag. Please stop. [product via technabob]